Luck
by Sophia Musgraves
Summary: Lily Evans was not a lucky girl- quite the opposite, actually. Sure, she was a witch, and she got to learn magic and go to Hogwarts, but when the consequences of her being 'special' was that she had to lose her best friend, her sister, Lily wasn't sure that her being magical was a lucky thing at all.


**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter**

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Lily Evans was not a lucky girl- quite the opposite, actually.

Sure, she was a witch, and she got to learn magic and go to Hogwarts, but when the consequences of her being 'special' was that she had to lose her best friend, her _sister_, Lily wasn't sure that her being magical was a lucky thing at all.

And of _course_ Lily was grateful for her new best friend- Severus Snape, but when he was the main cause of Petunia's bitterness towards Lily, she found it hard not to resent him slightly when she received letters from her parents, but never from her sister.

But that was not to say that Sev wasn't a great friend- he was-, but sometimes Lily wished that the girls in her dormitory would be her friends too. She wouldn't admit it (but who could she even admit it to?), but it _hurt_ when they abruptly stopped talking when she entered the room, just in case she'd go running to her _Slytherin_ friend and tell him of their conversation. It _hurt _when she was every body's last choice for a partner in class, and it _hurt_ when she had to spend every morning eating alone, and every evening alone in the common room, and every night trying hard not to care that the girls left her alone in her bed while they talked, gathered around Marlene's.

So Lily didn't think she was very lucky in her friendships, either.

Nobody knew that she'd prefer to take part in just one gossip session with her dorm mates instead of doing her homework and as a result of her loneliness, get praise from her Professors for her high grades. Nobody knew that the remarks sent to her by classmates such as 'know-it-all', 'goody-good', 'teacher's pet' and 'tattle-tale' cut her deep into her soul and chipped away at her spirit slowly, cruel word by cruel word. Nobody knew that Lily only dobbed in the Marauders because of her only friend at Hogwarts, and the way he would send her icy glares when he saw her laughing even a little at their antics. She didn't want to risk losing her only company in the big empty castle, so she'd tell on them, and Severus would be extra nice to her, and the Gryffindors would be extra nasty to her, and the cycle would repeat over and over again, wearing Lily down, until only a fraction of who she really was remained inside her.

Luck had just never been a factor in Lily's life.

And luck definitely wasn't on her side when Severus's worst enemy decided to fall in love with her. She couldn't like him back, not with Severus radiating hatred towards James Potter, so she hated him too, burying her true feeling underneath so much of her best friend's resentment. Lily would do anything for Severus, for their friendship- she'd leave her sister out of her life, she'd accept isolation from the girls, she'd take the insults from her classmates without a word, she'd become somebody she wasn't, and she'd refuse the only person who bothered with trying to see past the mask, the only person who saw that all was not what it seemed with her, and she'd thought Severus would do the same for her.

But luck failed her there too, the day after their fifth year defence against the dark arts owl. Severus had been distancing himself from her for quite a while, making new friends with the likes of Mulciber and Avery, and forcing Lily to do the same. She hadn't minded really, it was like a breath of fresh air to finally be accepted by the girls, to finally get to join in their gossiping, but she had thought she knew where she stood with Severus, thought that they were still best friends, and she'd still do anything for him, standing up for him when the girls made fun of him was a second nature to her, and she had expected no less from him.

Lily decided that perhaps luck _was_ present for her that day, the day she cut all ties with Severus. And maybe luck had just been waiting for Snape to go away.

Luck shone down on Lily from then on, Snape's dark cloud no longer blocking it from shining down on her.

Her relationship with Petunia did not improve- but everything else did. She still worked hard, but she had to work hard just to get the time to work hard, with all the things the girls had planned constantly. Lily was no longer left alone every night, she was no longer called a tattle-tale, goody-good, or anything else. She laughed at the Marauder's pranks, and laughed extra loud at the ones directed at Snape (which seemed to increase after their friendship terminated). She talked to James Potter in a civil manner, and banished the resentment surrounding him that Snape had dumped there. She was herself, and she didn't let anyone change her.

Luck was there, smiling down on Lily when she shared her first kiss with James, luck was there when they went on their first date. Luck was a guest at their wedding, did not desert her when the pair of them faced Voldemort twice, and was lingering when Harry was born.

But for the third time they faced him, luck was not on their side.

Luck hadn't been there when the prophecy was made nor heard, and luck was absent when they picked their secret keeper.

It was ironic that the cause of her bad luck was also the cause of her death.


End file.
